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Lol you'll probably be able to read it in either New Idea and/or Womans Weekly. It will probably be on ACA and Today Tonight as well.Originally posted by Holmes View PostComment
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The caption would read:
Mona's "That's not how you do it Doggie"
Dog "These don't taste anything like mine"Comment
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From Sam De Brito: http://blogs.smh.com.au/executive-st....html#comments
Here goes: I will now to try to defend the indefensible and explain why Canberra Raiders winger Joel Monaghan simulating a sexual act with a dog is not such a horrendous thing and, more importantly, how he can overcome the scandal.
Firstly, if you were one of the many hundreds of thousands of people who saw the picture of Monaghan with a Labrador's snout buried in his groin, here's what I reckon your reaction was.
If you were male, I'd say there was a better than 70 per cent chance that you laughed or at least shook your head, saying words to the effect of "Dude, what were you thinking?" or "You can't come back from that."
If you were female, there was a better than 70 per cent chance you said "Oh my God, that's disgusting."
Both groups are almost spot on, but let's put the "act" in perspective ...
Pretty much every person on earth has had a dog enthusiastically shove its nose up either their bum or their groin at some point in time.
If you're a woman who's been wearing a skirt at a barbecue, I also reckon there's a massive chance you've had Rover jump in like an Acapulco cliff diver.
DOGS LOVE HUMAN GROINS.
It's like guacamole dip for them or freshly made hummus; they've just got to give it at least one try before moving on to the next orifice.
It's what they do; it's part of the job description.
So, from the perspective of the dog involved in the Monaghan "scandal", I'll go out on a limb and say it wasn't overly traumatised by the incident; at worst it was the human equivalent of someone saying "taste this" and shoving a kebab in your face.
Monaghan was just a red-haired Schmacko.
Yet we have "fake WyattRoyMP", the Twitter user who publicised the photo via his account saying this:
"The reason I decided to post the picture was to highlight the issue of animal cruelty. Whether it be an average Joe or NRL star, what took place in the picture is wrong," he said.
What an idiot. If there's something I loathe more than actual cruelty, it's clowns like this who try to backend morality and worthiness on to infantile actions. Such integrity from a person who's anonymously co-opted the identity of federal politician.
Then, strangely, we also have the RSPCA getting into the act "writing a letter to ACT Chief Minister Jon Stanhope demanding any similar acts in the future be deemed illegal".
Huh?
If you've ever worked with dogs - as I'm sure most RSPCA workers have - you'd have had more snouts in your clacker than a trough at a pig farm.
Yet if I was to wander out to the pool naked one morning and my Labrador has a lick at my goolies before I can get the sleep out of my eyes, I'm going to jail if my neighbour's got his mobile phone camera ready?
And don't say this hasn't happened to you. Being naked around the wrong dog is like being a mulberry tree in a kindergarten - the fruit is gonna get picked.
Given, the Monaghan incident wasn't an "accident", but let's also put the premeditation (albeit drunken and probably seconds long) into context as well.
Back in 1997, 50,000 people laughed their arses off at Australia's largest film festival, Tropfest, when the third-placed film Indulgence went a little Monaghan.
Its premise?
An "urban myth" whereby a girl celebrates her birthday by covering herself with peanut butter and lets her dog lick it off. I remember it well and the laughter it generated from the crowd.
Where was the RSPCA then?
Of course, there was also the 2000 hit comedy Road Trip (which grossed more than $100 million worldwide) and which was allegedly the inspiration for Monaghan's act.
The dialogue in the movie goes thus:
KYLE: It's not cheating if you spread peanut butter on your balls and let your dog lick it off.
[Josh, Rubin and E.L. are understandably repulsed]
KYLE: Because it's your dog.
RUBIN: Jesus Christ!
KYLE: You know, because it's YOUR dog, get it?
RUBIN: Yeah, we've got it.
This year, SBS aired series two of Adam Zwar's comedy series Wilfrid, which received $1.5 million of federal and state taxpayers' money to get it going.
Its premise?
A dog that wants to root its owner.
Sure, the dog is a man dressed in a dog suit - but that's the gag - no one except Zwar can see it's a man in a dog suit.
Wilfred considers it a travesty that he was born a dog and shagging humans isn't allowed; he's always checking out hot chicks and probably wants to shag them as well.
THIS IS AN AUSTRALIAN GOVERNMENT FUNDED TV SHOW - so don't tell me the whole man and dog thing is not a source of obvious humour for a A LOT of people.
A friend of mine said to me last week that Monaghan could ever be redeemed because "people aren't rational when it comes to animals, especially dogs."
Well, I'm sorry, but I'm not a big fan of irrationaility whatever it involves and the outrage from some sports journos about this "act" is particularly irrational - and hypocritical - especially if you've ever seen a sports journo on the drink.
Monaghan was stupid and drunk and did something that 99.9 per cent of people would not do, but he didn't kill anyone, he didn't rape anyone, he didn't shit in a hotel, or physically abuse a soul.
He isn't even the first footballer to do what he did if you're to believe a 2003 column in the London Telegraph where current assistant coach to the Wallabies, Jim Wiliams, recounted a similiar tale about a very well-known Australian rugby union player.
"We had one of those video conferencing systems where players could talk to and see their wives and kids back in Australia. Any way, in the week before the final, **** ******, who had been injured and had returned home, was using one to send us a good-luck message," Williams told the Telegraph.
"He was talking to the guys and when he walked into shot it was obvious that he had no shirt on. I thought he just had no top on but his wife, who was holding the video camera, panned down to reveal that **** was stark naked. Better than that, his dog - he had a big Alsatian - then walked over, nudged him in the nuts and started licking. I've never seen anything like it.
"We found out afterwards that **** had rubbed jam or honey into his groin to get his dog to do that on cue. It was his way of settling down the squad who were really tense and worried at the final coming up," said Williams.
So, if you wanna claim this rugby union gentleman or Joel Monaghan "physically abused" the dogs - see the top of this post.
The dogs are fine.
Monaghan should do a photo story in a few weeks for a woman's magazine, with the Labrador in question, and go for something like this, then get a sponsorship with My Dog or Pal (tagline, "it tastes better than me"), but make your apology, then move on, Joel.
The rest of us will, soon enough.Comment
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Personally, I reckon the picture of Joel would have been a lot more distasteful if it were the "Cougar" Charmayne hanging off his frank and beans
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Well he has resigned from the club.Comment
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Watching that press conference almost made me teary. I know it was a horrible thing to do but all these stupid headlines, get some perspective. He wasn't **cking a dog for god's sake. And how is that ANY worse than drug taking, gang banging and glassing and beating up your gf?! Obsessive media and their pursuit to ruin people for the sake of a story, congratulations, you did.Comment
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Are you serious you old cow ?????Originally posted by Chickadee View Post
Damn sake...the bloke in question (Monaghan) is now suffering his just deserves.
People like myself fight very hard to earn 50k a year, and make sure we stick by the rules by our employers.
If I even thought to do what he did my career would've ended before it started.
Bad luck Joel Monaghan.....99% of Australians are a lot worse off than you are.
P.S. He's a wealthy man and the rest of us did'nt get his luck.Comment
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I struggle to believe anyone would employ you. Period. And FYI for me to be old you would have to be 12, but given the content of your posts that wouldn't suprise me. Go to bed diddums.Comment
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Must be good to be such a clean skin. Never done anything wrong? Where do you work that your employer has in the rules "you must not let a dog lick your slong". I have studied my employment contract and nothing in there about that.Originally posted by wuzup rooster View PostComment
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To think you even wasted your time responding to me is a joke on its own.Originally posted by Chickadee View Post
Late shift in the ugly lesbian house hold is a disgrace enough...let alone wasting it with a Souths supporter.
Pm me
...dont
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Just a stupid night on the piss, bet the majority of people on here have woken up the morning after a big night and regretted some of the things they've done.Originally posted by Chickadee View Post
Stupid night where his decisions were clouded by alcohol like you said compare that to some other situations that have ended in lighter sentences and it's hard not to feel for the bloke.Comment
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